exhausted...

The other day I remembered a funny incident from my teenage years.

We had just returned from a long road trip to Expo '86 in Vancouver. Our cousins from California had also driven up, spent the week with us there and then driven back to Utah to vacation and visit family here. They were staying at our house and late one night, we girls (my sister, me and our cousins, Stephanie and Kristin) decided to transform ourselves into mid-century debutantes by dressing up in some of my mom's clothes from the 50's and making ourselves up. We got all gussied up, and, unsatisfied with just hanging around the house, we got the idea that we should go get doughnuts. By this time, my mom, completely exhausted from the trip and having a house full of guests, was fast asleep in bed. We tiptoed into her room, woke her up and asked if we could take the car to go out. She told us no because we didn't know where the doughnut place was. We did a little begging but she didn't budge. So, we sat around for a few more minutes in our fancy outfits and then went to bed. The next morning we asked her why she wouldn't let us go and she had no recollection of our conversation but probably told us no because she thought we were still in Vancouver and that we didn't know our way around.

I found her confusion hard to believe as a young, energetic teenager. But I really understand how it could happen as a worn out, tired, exhausted mother myself. Just the other day Ella asked me why I hadn't gotten her a Band-Aid for the cut on her finger that she had shown me--when she woke me up from my afternoon nap. Like my mom, I had no recollection of our conversation.

I've known for several weeks now that I'm not getting enough sleep (who does when they have a newborn, right?) but forgetting conversations is taking to an entirely new level. I just keep telling myself that this won't last forever and that I will eventually get a good night's sleep. For now, I'm just taking it one day at a time and getting a little shut-eye whenever possible. I've found that I can actually nap in some pretty strange places and positions. Speaking of sleep, it's bedtime for me (yea!) so until next time, zzzzzzzzzz...